Rehab reality not a joke!

We use to laugh that when we ended I would end up in Rehab. I am not in physical Rehab but mentally and emotionally I am so there. After a long conversation yesterday with a friend that knows both of us, I realized that maybe he is right that we are co-dependent on each other. He was like my prozac he relieved all my pain. We had our problems and issues but he always seem to help me settle down and think my situations out rather it was business or family. He help me thru all the major things in my life since 2007. Even when his life was not on track he could figure out mine. I could talk to him about almost everything. I could be "Just Bo" and laugh and be silly if I wanted to and he never told me to act my age or grow up. When I was focused on business and I was trying to think out my ideas, he help me break them down and made them make sense. Business was the hard part for us because our business methods were so different and business is the part I will not bend on if I feel I am right. For someone that was not physically under my roof , his presence has been here the whole time with me.

Now I am just trying to get pass the hurt, anger and pain to move forward. We talk about this but for some reason me moving on without him in any part of my life has not been easy. I talk to alot of ppl on the daily basis to try to feel the void but it is not the same. I get attention but it is not the same. I remember this song that came out when I lived in Cali called "Tell them what they want to hear". To be honest that is what I feel I do now. There is only one person that I tell my true feelings to and now I fight that feeling also. So now I am left with alot of empty flirting and no real emotions for anyone. I have to focus on my family, business and work to get pass this feeling.

I know there will be another but they will never have my all again. I can't handle the hurt,anger and pain again. I will give a part of me and I will love again but total all in 100% , I got your back love not happening for me. I guess to be totally honest about the situation there will never be another person in my life the way my ex was in my life unless miracles happen and it is my ex back in my life after everything is fixed