Love Lessons Learned

I was talking to my best friend and she has come to the conclusion that I have it bad. She has been knowing me since I was 17 and she said she has only seem me this way twice. I have to admit it that for years I have wanted so bad to feel the way I do today. My divorce was final in 2005 and I have tried a couple of relationships since then one of them I taught would end in marriage but I am so glad that  I didnt make that mistake. I did the marriage thing for 15 years before and I ended it because I still was not in love with him the way he loved me and I did not feel myself growing personally. I have always said that I desire to get remarried. I had people to tell me at our age we shouldn't get remarried just have a life companion. It is something about the unity of marriage that I want in my life. I know it is only a piece of paper but to God it is so much more. If you have follow my blogs then you know that I was in love a few years back and it took me a long time to let go and move on with my life. After I let go , I wanted love but was afraid of letting someone new get to know me. I had a list of things I didn't want in a man. I didn't realize that I had been emotionally and mentally attached to someone else for awhile. I didn''t realize that until he gave me the silent treatment and I did not talk to him in over a week. I felt my whole world had been taking away from me. Then I tried to run from it and I have always been good at that one, I run if I think I will get hurt or have problems that I can not deal with. When I try to run now he always plants my feet back on solid ground and I am okay. I have tried to run but he is always in the middle street answering where am i going. I love him and I will admit it. I want to spend the rest of my life with him..